3 Ways to Enhance Your Mental Health at Work [Part 2]
Actionable steps to take care of yourself at work.
This letter is a continuation of what we started discussing last week on mental health.
This week we’ll discuss three more actionable steps:
Say “No” more often: Focus on what matters.
My recipe for dealing with imposter syndrome.
Speak your mind: Don’t only be nice, but also be direct.
#1 🙅 Say “No” More Often: Focus on What Matters
More often than not, I find myself rushing to take on more work. I raise my hand whenever someone needs something handed over. Regardless of whether I have the time or capacity for it. I always thought I "could make" the capacity.
This most often ended up poorly. I would have to rush the work, leading to inaccuracies in delivery.
Because I wouldn't have enough time to thoroughly cover all aspects of a task. I'd deliver with small or big pitfalls that I shouldn't have missed if I were focusing all my efforts on one task at a time.
Trying to be a hero without the capacity for it is irresponsible. You end up being a bad hero and even get criticized by the same people you tried to help.
💼 What you should do:
🎯 Focus on One Target: Invest all your time and effort into one target at any given time. Don’t juggle too much. You’ll end up making mistakes. Put conscious effort into stopping yourself from picking more work, until you finish the task at hand.
🙅♂️ Say No: Say no to anything that is distracting, from unnecessary meetings to requests from someone to unnecessary calls. And most of all, put your phone in the drawer while you work.
✅ Say No in the Right Manner: Mastering the art of refusal is crucial. Instead of a direct "No," try phrases like, "I'm currently handling a lot, XYZ, can we find another time?", "I'd like to assist but I'm swamped at the moment, perhaps person X or document Y could help?", or "I'm interested in helping, but let's aim for the end of the week when I can dedicate the right focus to Z." The essence is clear communication and offering alternatives when possible.
🔪 Break Down the Tasks: When you take on one big chunk of a task, break it down into small, measurable, digestible tasks. Eat the elephant one bite at a time. And you better share your food.
👫 Distribute the Load with People: Make room for others to work with you. Don’t do everything by yourself. Give others a chance to take on the workload too. Don’t be shy to ask. They’ll appreciate you sharing the work.
#2👩🏼🍳 My Recipe For Dealing With Imposter Syndrome
I hadn't heard of that term until recently. And, honestly, most of what we feel isn't about being an imposter but rather about feeling that we don't fit in or that we're not as good as other people. At least, that's the case for me.
Sometimes I feel I'm not as good as person X or person Y.
This was more of an issue in my first 1-3 years in the industry. But now, I think I've been handling this better.
So, let's discuss my recipe for not looking down on myself but rather respecting it.
💼 What you should do:
🤝 Respect Your Abilities: Know your strengths and improve them. If unsure, seek feedback on what others value in working with you.
🎭 Acknowledge Differences: Understand that everyone has unique strengths and weaknesses. Nobody is perfect; we all have our flaws.
✅ Accept Limited Control: Recognize that not everything is under your control. Adapt to your circumstances rather than compare with others. Find what works for you and be patient.
👩🔬 Focus on the Present: Don't overthink the future. Plan, but live in the moment and tackle what's directly in front of you.
🫡 Respect, Don't Idolize: Your colleagues may be smart, but remember they're human and make mistakes too. Use the opportunity to learn from them without placing them on a pedestal.
#3 🗣️ Speak Your Mind: Don’t Only Be Nice, But Also Be Direct
I've always been bold in expressing my thoughts. I don't hesitate to speak up about what I think is wrong and needs changing.
Yet, I know many struggle with this. For example, a friend of mine has been working with a micro-manager for years. She never spoke up or attempted to change teams, believing it was her fault.
As you can guess, this took a toll on her mental health. Don’t be that person!
Here’s how I think it should be…
💼 What you should do:
💪 Say What You Want: People are terrible mind readers. Put your needs and wants in clear and concise words. For that, you need to first, identify what those are. Writing or drawing them out can help. I know it helps me A LOT!
⏰ Timing is key. Don't make requests during inconvenient times. For instance, avoid during a critical incident or when the company is facing cutbacks.
👌 Learn the "How": To get what you want, consider giving others what they want first. Show how fulfilling your request can benefit them as well, and prepare your approach carefully.
🥸 Be Respectful: Boldness doesn't equal rudeness. Always communicate with kindness and respect. Avoid insults or negative talks about others.
🍔 Key Takeaways:
Set clear boundaries for yourself.
Respect people but don’t idolise them.
Say no more often. Don’t try to be a hero if it’ll break you.
Be self-aware. Know your strengths and your weaknesses.
Embrace gentleness. Be bold but not mean with your requests.
Focus on the present, and stop worrying too much about the future.
These tips are not set in stone—feel free to adjust and tailor them to fit your needs.
Remember, it’s all about finding that sweet spot between respecting your limits and pushing for growth, between being a team player while not losing yourself in the process.
Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it, let me know by hitting the like button ❤️ to help others find it on Substack, and share it to spread the love!
🗞️ Great articles you don’t want to miss:
No Buts! — by
How to manage up as an engineer or a manager — by
Getting into Tech in 2024 — by
How I Upgraded My Conflict Resolution Skills (Part 2) — by
That’s all folks, let me know what you think of this article in the comments.
Or speak to me on direct message on any tech topics you’d like! I’d love to hear from you. 😊
The tricky thing about the imposter syndrome is that real imposters can't tell if they are imposters until later. 😃 I totally had it that's why I know.
Saying no is equally important. The sooner you learn it in life the better. Great stuff, Basma!
I really like the guidance of ' Say No in the Right Manner' I think it's really important to set expectations in a clear and constructive way. You don't have to be cold and candid with your no's, you just need to be honest with your situation. Great share and thanks for the read!